John Gunter

Thoughts on Life and Living

Thoughts on life in the midst of a tragic death

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(Getty Images/Stephen Dunn)

Take me back 15 years ago.  I think if there was anyone whom I would have switched lives with, it would have been Junior Seau.  He was at the top of his game in football and seemingly, in life.  He played the coolest position in football and he was the best at it.  Junior loved the game and it showed.  He had fun.  Men rallied around him.  He made massive amounts of money for playing a game most of us would gladly play for free.

Junior was still playing as of January 2010.  Just over two years ago.  This week Junior Seau quite unexpectedly committed suicide.  He has been on my mind a good bit these past few days.

Thinking about Junior Seau as of one week ago, he still appeared to have it all.  At 43 years old, he was still young enough to do everything you would want to in life, save play professional football.  He had more than enough money to live comfortably for the remainder of his life.  Junior was a hero in his communities of both San Diego (where he grew up and played) and within the Samoan-Americans.  He had a family that loved him and a stellar name that would follow him for the rest of his life.  A week ago today, you would have thought that Junior was set up well to live a tremendous life for the next 40 years.

It is impossible to ever make sense of a tragedy of this level, so I will not try to here.  However, I do think there are principles that you can draw upon from this horrible event.

First, you never know what is going on inside the minds and hearts of other people.  We all have our secrete lives.  We all have our thoughts that we would be ashamed of if someone else knew [Read more…]

Upon second look. . . David and Goliath

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Henderson vs. Tucker. . .um, I mean David vs. Goliath

It was the first game of the season. We had just completed summer football 3-a-days (yes, we had three practices a day in the Atlanta August heat). All off season, we had heard of the greatness of the Tucker team, led by a consensus all-American defensive end/fullback. Personally, it was my first big varsity game as a starter AND it was against the school where I knew many of the players (and fans from both sides). The stadium would be packed. To say the least, I was nervous.

Sitting in the courtyard of my high school an hour before getting on the bus to the stadium, our head coach sat us down for the climatic pre-game motivational talk. To my surprise, Coach Wilson raised a Bible, opened it to 1 Samuel 17, and promptly read the story of David and Goliath. The general theme. . . with faith, you can accomplish anything. Coach Wilson’s point was that with faith, we could beat our Goliath, Tucker. We were, I suppose, David.

We lost in an embarrassing blow-out. Goliath dominated us. 

No offense to Coach Wilson, whom I really liked and respected, but upon second look, he completely missed on the main point of this story (and clearly the “motivational talk” was ineffectual as well).

Read this story again (1 Samuel 17), as I have this past week and see what you think. Upon second [Read more…]

The best and worst of my life in Asia

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Daniel (left) and another of the great men I am with over here. . . Michael Gregory (right) this weekend.

This weekend was full. This weekend was rich. Wonderfully disgusting amounts of fried food. Various and a sundry beverage. Laughter by all. Prayer, memories shared, and well-wishes expressed for a great friend and fellow sojourner. Misty eyes and a grateful heart as I fly away.

I am currently on a plane from one Asian city, back to the one in which I currently live. This weekend was for the purpose of spending a final weekend and having a going away party for one of my best friends over here. Daniel Schneider and I have been friends since 2007, but our friendship ramped up when he moved back over to Asia in 2010. We have grown together and dreamed of things we wanted to see accomplished for the good over here. We were part of an epic vacation last year in Koh Lanta, Thailand. That little island, as well as those of us on that trip, will never be the same. We have laughed with and pushed each other towards growth in many areas these past few years.

Last night, about 20 of us from around this country came together in the top section of a small Irish pub. We did this to honor Daniel’s time over here, celebrate his pending marriage to a wonderful woman, and “send him back” to America for a new stage in life. It was a great time had by all, but I hope it was particularly meaningful for Daniel.

Here is the deal, the absolute best part of my life here in Asia is the people with whom I have the privilege of living, studying, and working. I am amazed at the caliber of people that [Read more…]

The Leadership/Popularity Conundrum

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NO THIS IS NOT ME. . . Michael Scott was often an example of failed leadership by trying to gain popularity.

Popularity, to some extent, is often what brings people into positions of leadership.  Whether it is to the position of CEO, president of a country, student government, the garden club, or the Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin, popularity plays some role in people being placed in positions of leadership.  You advance at work by being popular with your bosses, in politics by having more votes than anyone else, and at school by having the most friends.  You even gain “leadership of a family” by being popular with your girlfriend to the point of her agreeing to marriage.  Then it comes time to lead and the followers (employees or voters or teammates or. . .) want their absolute way in everything.  I’m no different in times of being subordinate to people.

Leading based primarily upon popularity will eventually end in the failure of the leader.  Leadership is anything but a popularity contest.  Leadership 101 is that “you can’t please everyone, every time.”  It is my experience that in leadership, though, this doesn’t go nearly far enough.  In reality, with very few exceptions, it should be “you WILL disappoint someone every time.”  Just as there are multiple sides to every story, there are also going to be multiple opinions of every leadership decision.  True leadership is making what you are confident is the right call and moving forward to execute this decision.  Nothing more, nothing less.

24 Saul said to Samuel, “I have sinned, for I have transgressed the commandment of the Lord and your words, because I feared the people and obeyed their voice. 25 Now therefore, please pardon my sin and return with [Read more…]

Mom’s laugh and sacrificial heart

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John Gunter with parents
Mom, Dad, and I at their surprise birthday last year

Today, my Mom (Kay Gunter) is on my mind.  If you don’t know her, that is too bad.  She has a laugh that is inexplicably delightful.  She laughs from her belly.  She laughs loud and boisterous, the kind of laugh you can hear from far away locations, like from Atlanta to Toledo.  She laughs in a way that makes everyone in the room happier for being there.

Additionally, my Mom is sweet and kind.  She visits EVERYONE in nursing homes, hospitals, dungeons, caves, sewers, and every other rough place people who are fortunate enough to know my Mom end up.  Seriously, my entire life has been filled with her serving people who are down, [Read more…]

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