This article is a continuation of the one I posted last week, “Fear only talks to those who listen”. If you have not read that one, please CLICK HERE.
Recently, I was talking with a close local Asian Christian brother. He lives in a different city than I do, yet we see each other fairly often. We met for coffee and to talk about life and work.
My friend is a man of courage and integrity. He is a great father and husband. He is intelligent and a graduate of one of the best universities in this country. He is a man who is doing amazing work in serving and helping many people through the love and message of the Gospel of Christ Jesus.
My friend’s impact is far and wide. I’m not speaking in hyperbole here; he really is a man of incredible integrity and impact on a very large scale.
My friend, though, is very discouraged. There was actually no need to share this with me, as I could see it in his eyes as we interacted in a meeting of peers earlier in the week.
As a result of several stresses converging upon him at the same time, discouragement has set upon him like a lead x-ray vest (yes, I have been injured far too many times if this is the word picture that comes to mind!). This discouragement has caused him to doubt himself, his calling, and some of the great works he has started which are legitimately helping many people in many ways.
As I was thinking about fear last week (click here for the article), this conversation has me thinking about discouragement in much the same way. As is the case with fear, discouragement grips us all from time to time. Though I feel empathy for my friend who is currently stuck in this season of discouragement, this is not what concerned me most about our conversation.
I am most concerned that my friend is now allowing his discouragement to cause him self-doubt. He is questioning his “worthiness” in leadership and he is contemplating abandoning this work for which he is ideally suited.
As I was sharing with my friend and trying to encourage him to keep pressing forward, the reality hit me afresh.
Discouragement is rough. It can take the most confident of people and turn them on their heads. It can cause the most driven person to cower in insecurity. It can cause clear callings and convictions to become cloudy and murky.
However, just as is the case for fear, discouragement is a lie and it is not from God. God doesn’t speak to us in the form of discouragement. When we allow discouragement as a basis for making life decision, allow it to influence our callings, I honestly believe we are wrong. We are building upon a lie. Plain and simple.
God only speaks to us through His written Word and through His Spirit. The “fruit” or character of His Spirit is clearly spelled out in Galatians 5:22.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control
I tried to help rally my friend through this reality from Scripture, just as I have for myself a thousand times before. God doesn’t speak in words and forms of fear and discouragement. Though my friend was hearing and feeling discouragement, he didn’t need to confuse his discouragement as being from God.
The voice of God is only that of faith, hope, and love. The voice of God will always be based in and springing forth from the fruit of the Spirit. Nothing more. Nothing less.
My friend and I prayed together in the corner of that coffee house we were meeting in, embraced hands, and went our separate ways.
Now, I’m back at my apartment, sitting on my deck, watching this city close down for the night, and thinking about my Asian friend from the coffeehouse. I am praying for him. I am praying that he will have the courage, strength, and grace to push through the voices of lies, fear, and discouragement that have been plaguing him of late.
I am praying my friend will simply hear the voice of God.
“Faith, hope, love. . . faith, hope love. . . faith, hope, love…”
This brought a rush of tears to my eyes…I have a friend who has listened to the voices of fear and discouragement and has recently made a decision to be guided by lies rather than God’s word. He has now chartered a course away from the Lord and into sin and my heart is broken.
“When we allow discouragement as a basis for making life decisions, allow it to influence our callings, I honestly believe we are wrong. We are building upon a lie. Plain and simple.” This describes my friend exactly.
My heart is aching for him – for the choices he is making right now that will most likely have profound and lasting consequences in his life. I too am praying that he will “simply hear the voice of God.” That God is ever faithful, ever hopeful and loves always. He will continue to seek after that one lost sheep that has wandered far away. “His hand is stretched out still.” Thanks for this post, John. I’ll pray for your friend as well.
Amy, so sorry to hear of your friend and the place he is in right now. Very difficult to see and be a part of. I both hate it for him and those who love him.
Thanks for sharing your thought here. Praying for your friend right now.
So…how is he now?
I concur with you that discouragements are rough. I have doubted God severally the many times I was discouraged. Yap! Discouragement is a lie. I pray that your friend realises that and doesn’t fall into it. Tell him to be encouraged in the Lord. He who began a good work in him is faithful and is going to bring it to completion. Tell him to fight to stay the course and not to allow himself to be distracted by satans lies.
[Responding like a pentecostal that I am]
You’re a good sunset photographer. 😀
Great stuff! I will let him know. Thanks for the words. He is still in his rough period, but there is hope. I’m sure he will be fine, in the end, but it is always tough to see someone you care about struggling. Thanks and have a great weekend!
Oh yeah, thanks about the picture! The place is so pretty, though, that any pic is going to look great.
I came across your blog a few months back when you were featured in Ruthie Dean’s blog, and I really enjoyed it. So, I have been keeping up since then. As much as I have enjoyed all of the posts I have read and had take-aways from each of them, this one really hit home for me when I read it yesterday. Without sharing the details, I have been going through a really rough time the last few months, and have been battling serious discouragement. My discouragement might not stem from the same circumstanaces as your friend’s, but it is there, it is real, and I can very well relate to the part you wrote when you said “It can take the most confident of people and turn them on their heads.” To me it has felt like a black hole, stealing all joy, purpose, and direction in my life. God used your post yesterday to speak volumes to me, more than I can even type, so I wanted to say thank you. The Lord is using your words to impact people you have never met, all over the world. I am hanging on to Faith Hope Love
I completely understand how you are feeling, as I have been there a few times. My words to my friend in this post were based on my own personal experience of constantly clinging to faith, hope, and love in the midst of the noisiness of life. Thanks for letting me know that blog has been helpful. Praying for you right now as I have been praying for my friend here. Thanks for sharing!